My Story
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My Cinderella Story |
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| Gaining weight - losing self confidence |
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| Dreams Do Come True! |
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| I reached my point of desperation at age 47, 320 pounds, with severe sleep apnea, insulin resistance, high cholesterol and high triglycerides, symptoms of heart disease, intense back and knee pain, and unable to walk up a flight of stairs without stopping to gasp for air. Why did it take me so long? Because I didn’t realize I was one who would benefit from weight loss surgery – I didn’t realize I was ‘that bad’. Actually after 40 years of diets and two years of monthly visits to an obesity specialist, in a state of exasperation I said to the NP at my regular visit, “Maybe I should just have weight loss surgery” and she said, “I think that is a wise choice for you”. I was actually surprised she didn’t say – no you haven’t reached that point. The truth was I was only existing, no longer living. I couldn’t participate in most activities with family and friends, couldn’t reach my potential in my career, was ashamed of how I looked and knew my days were numbered.
Although weight loss surgery was a big step it was a choice that finally gave me hope.
My battle began literally from birth. When I was eight weeks old the pediatrician told my mother I was gaining weight too rapidly and suggested she cut my formula with milk. I was an overweight child larger than all my classmates and friends. By 5th grade I weighed 128 pounds. I couldn’t trade clothes with girlfriends the way all teens do, and most of my clothes had to be custom made. My wedding dress was a size 18 with altered sleeves just to fit my arms. No matter what I did I couldn’t seem to lose weight. As I gained weight I lost self confidence. My mother helped me find every imaginable diet and exercise program and despite making lots of weight loss goals I failed at them all.
When I had my gastric by pass surgery I took it vey seriously and made life changes. I’m at a healthy weight now and all my co-morbidities are gone. I still don’t like to exercise but I know I have to so I do it. I have not reintroduced sugar (more than single digit grams per serving) and don’t plan to ever allow that in my diet. I know I was addicted to sugar and it can happen again if I lose focus and allow it to. For an addict there is no moderation – only abstinence.
After a lifetime of failing at losing weight I was thrilled to find hope for the metabolic mess I was. My background is in Christian psychology so with years of counseling and ministry experience nothing makes me happier than encouraging someone in a similar situation with their obesity. If I can make a difference for someone else and offer them hope where all they find is shame – then all I have been through is worth it.
My dream is that the weight loss community comes together whether surgical or non surgical means were used. If we change our lifestyle and keep focused on our new commitment we won’t need diets. I want to open those doors of hope to many through Success Habits workshops and Back on Track workshops. I’m overjoyed at the research, educational information and support I have found in BSCI and the ‘dream team’. I hope to carry their message throughout the southeast to encourage all those southern belles that the clock hasn’t struck midnight yet – there is still time to find their Cinderella life!
Sandy Baker
Savannah, GA
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